We have a good Daddy in this house

For the past two days I've been sitting in a tiny room in a hotel with about 35 other people.  I have to take a class required by the state for my teacher certification.  My weekend involved getting up at 6:00am, driving 40 minutes across town, and sitting in a room doing teacher activities (none of which are new to me), that I will never use because I don't have a classroom.

Can you tell I have a bad attitude?

And in a month, I have to go back for another weekend.  Blech.

Brian, on the other hand, facilitated Daddy daycare while I was gone from 7:00-4:00 all weekend.  Friday night we laid in bed and went over schedules.

"I will give her medicine at 7:00 before I leave, you need to make sure then she eats at 8:00, 10:00, 12:00, 2:00, and medicine at 4:00.  Then I'll take over when I get home."

"Do you know how to mix up her food and how much to give her?"

"Do you know how to tell if she wants more food?"

"Do you know what to do with her nighttime diaper when she wakes up?"

"Are you gonna go anywhere?  Should I take your truck and leave you the car?"

I knew he'd do just fine because he helps out so much anyway, but still, it was a little stressful to leave someone else in charge for so long...even if it's Daddy.

I got texts throughout the day.

"Sadie is up, fed, dressed, and outside with me while I water plants."

"She also figured out how to tumble out of her tumbleform chair.  I came around a corner and saw her just about to roll out head first."

"Sadie is playing on her table."

"Super duper ultra sad mega cute sad lip due to a mild head bonk."

"She finished her peach yogurt that she didn't complete this morning.  She was still hungry, so I did a frozen cube of green beans.  Pretty funny reaction she gave at new food."

"Sadie is not a super eater today.  Also she has bloody gums at the molar spot.  Ouchie."

He did a good job.  And today wasn't so bad, I relaxed much more.  But, I am so thankful that I get to work from home and don't have to go to a classroom all day and be tired when I come home, but still have to take care of Sadie and dinner and bathing and whatever.

We are blessed.  And we have a good Daddy in this house.

Thanksgiving Day 5

If you're like most mommies, you do everything...even if you have another full/part time job and also contribute to the household income. And if you're lucky, like I am, you have an amazing husband who helps out a lot.

I don't think Brian was planning to do this much work when I got pregnant and we started planning to have a baby. I'm not sure I was either. But things don't always go the way you expected, and in the NICU, Brian really stepped up. I was a wreck that week; I was physically tired from having a baby, I was emotionally tired from being told my baby is going to die, I was tired of crying, I was tired of imagining my future, I was discouraged, I was disappointed, and I was scared. But when I couldn't be out with Sadie because my body hurt and I had to lie down, Brian was with her. And when I wanted to give up, he held me strong and suggested I try this or just go one more day of that. And it's because of him that I have been strong enough these last 2 years to deal with this kind of lifestyle.

For the first 8 months of Sadie's life, I don't think I put her down. I held her all day, she nursed in my arms to nap, she slept with me at night, we were connected, and if I put her down (or in the car seat) there was screaming. She wanted to be held all.the.time. But I desperately needed a break. And that's when Daddy stepped in. Brian recognized that I needed a break, so every Saturday he started kicking me out of the house. I would run errands, go grocery shopping, sometimes just sit on the floor in the library (where it's quiet) and look at books, it didn't matter, it was a break. (I think one time I sat in the parking lot at the post office and just talked on the phone!)

In those days I couldn't be gone long because Sadie was nursing, and she would never take a bottle, so I could only leave for a couple of hours. But these days, I have more freedom to be gone longer. And even though Sadie is probably more work these days when I'm gone, Brian can handle it.

Everyday I write out a feeding schedule for Sadie according to what we're doing that day. Then I add up all the ounces and make sure she's getting enough liquid. I'm pretty obsessive about it. Then we have our specific routines, like in the mornings I get her up at 7:00 whether she's awake or not. You might think I'm crazy, but when she gets up early, she goes to sleep early. And I really need her to be up and "eating" for 12 hours in order to get enough liquid in her to keep her hydrated! She gets medicine @ 7:00 and her tube feed @ 7:30, then she watches Sesame Street and when it's over she eats food by mouth. Feeding Sadie by mouth is not easy. She doesn't swallow really well, she spits a lot of it out, she gags, and sometimes she sneezes and food goes EVERYWHERE. It can be very frustrating and Brian doesn't like to do it. Plus she doesn't know how to tell you when she's full, so if you try to get more in there than she can take, she'll throw it all up.

But today, I wanted to sleep in. And Brian recognized that I needed to, so he got up at 7:00 on his Saturday (mind you, on week days, he goes to bed at 10:00 and gets up at 7:30, he really likes to sleep) and got Sadie started. He gave her her medicines, gave her her morning tube feed, got Sesame Street started, and even made me some tea. When I got up, there was no stress, because Brian had it handled and stepped right in! It was a great way to start the day!

I am so thankful for Brian because when I need to be in two places at once (ie. making dinner for us and feeding Sadie by mouth) Brian is willing and able to step in and help me out. He is selfless. He understands that I am only one person. And he gets how exhausting it can be to take care of Sadie all day (because he's done it!) I am thankful that he loves Sadie and me enough to try to feed her and bathe her and put her to bed. He wants to give me breaks, and he wants to help out with Sadie (even if he hates changing diapers) and he wants us to be a parenting team. I'm still Mommy, and I still do most of it...but it's so nice to have a Daddy that I can rely on if/when I need to.

Sadie's favorite Daddy

When I got pregnant and we started planning for a baby there was so much I thought I knew, but Brian was just clueless about all of it, and he wasn't afraid to admit it. And when I went into labor, he was the only man in the room, and the only one who had never been through labor, and he was wise enough to keep his mouth SHUT! He did a great job during our homebirth reminding me to breathe, encouraging me, and getting me everything I needed. But we had practiced that part of it!!

When Sadie was born, we were so unprepared for the turn of events, it could have easily cracked either of us, or our marriage. The reason it didn't is because my husband is so strong. He has turned into the best Daddy I could ever imagine, and the best Daddy for Sadie.

So, in honor of Father's Day, here are the top 10 reasons Brian is such a good Dad:

10. He goes to as many doctor's appointments as he can.

9. Even though it may be a little more work, he always encourages me to use cloth diapers and feed her homemade food because it's better for her.

8. He uses the word, "ouchies" even when it's NOT Sadie that hurts.

7. Sadie and Daddy walk to the mailbox everyday to get the mail.

6. He is the best at reading The Hungry Caterpillar.

5. He can't keep his hands or his lips off of her, because he just loves her so much.

4. When he gets her from the tub each night, before he puts a diaper on her, he makes sure he squeezes those little cheeks. (I hope this ritual ends before she's 11)

3. He helps put her to bed.

2. I can go out for the evening and he can remember to give her medicines, make sure her feeds start on time, and get her in bed asleep all by himself.

1. He gets up and goes to sleep with Sadie when she wakes up in the night.

I hope that your children also have awesome Daddy's and I encourage you to celebrate them today. Even if it's the little things that they do that you appreciate so much, let Dad know. Chances are, if he's like Brian, he doesn't do it because he has to, but because he LIKES to.

Happy Father's Day!