Breaking up is hard to do

We're going to have to break up with daycare.

Here's the deal. Every Wednesday and Friday I drive almost 45 minutes to take Sadie to Physical Therapy...that's how much we love our PT! And I figured since I'm already that far away, why not try taking Sadie to the special needs daycare (United Cerebral Palsy) which is also 45 minutes away from our home, but only about 10 from PT. Then, while Sadie's at daycare, I spend 4ish hours at Starbucks working.

Sounds like a good deal, right?

Last week our beloved Physical Therapist told us her business is changing and she's no longer going to be at that location, but instead only do home visits. Her business partner has taken another job and will be significantly decreasing her patient load, so they have to cut down on costs to stay in business. And her home visits won't be anywhere near where we live. *sad face*

But, as sad as I am to lose Tami, I'm not really that sad about not driving 45 minutes one way twice a week, or having my butt go sore from sitting in a hard wooden chair for 4ish hours, or getting home and realizing that I smell like coffee... or paying $100 a week for daycare. And Tami said she could see Sadie at daycare, but I told her, if we're not driving up there specifically for therapy, I'm not sure I want to do daycare anymore.

Brian agrees. We'd be saving a lot of money by breaking up with daycare. In fact, we're even thinking about taking that money and spending it on a cleaning lady instead. (my dream come true...)

So why am I nervous? Is it because we haven't really been there that long and I feel like they made some huge adjustments for us? Is it because I feel like I might regret it? Is it because I'm afraid they're going to shove a paper in my face "reminding" me that I signed a contract for a certain amount of time? (I don't remember doing this, but that doesn't mean I didn't) I guess I should just do it.

Dear daycare, it's not you, it's us. We love you, but you're inconvenient, and expensive, and we need to move on. I hope we can stay friends.

Love,

Sadie and Mommy

Sadie's first day of "school"

Daycare went better than I could have ever expected today. After my post last night, I got a lot of responses, both on facebook and as blog comments, saying that I should ease into it. People suggested that I take my time moving a little farther and farther away until I'm in the car. While these were good suggestions, they only stressed me out more. I was going to get to Daycare around 11:00 and I had to be at Starbucks, signed in and working by 11:30. There was no time to wean myself, so then I started worrying that maybe I'm going about this all wrong!!

But we were fine. Both of us.

First of all, I got the go ahead from GI to give Sadie a second dose of reflux medicine (that is FINALLY actually working) in the evening... and she slept all night. So, she woke up happy and rested and probably feeling pretty good compared to how crappy she's felt the last 2 weeks!

We headed off to therapy and she didn't puke, she didn't scream, she hardly protested when Tami had her all twisted into a pretzel!! I'm glad Sadie is usually really good for Tami because for that first year of PT, all Sadie seemed to do was scream. Tami has really paid her dues!

After this kind of morning, I wasn't worried at all about daycare. Miss Lauren was expecting us and the other teachers welcomed us when we walked in the room. I showed her what was in the bag and she said they'd label everything (I told her I didn't know how!). I showed her the journal and she said they have their own form that they fill out daily that logs when diapers were changed, what your child ate, and some comments about what she did that day. Plus Miss Lauren also created a special sheet for Sadie to log her tube feeds and how much liquid she was getting.

Have I mentioned before how much I like everyone at UCP?!

We got there right at lunch time, and what Lauren showed me had been "pureed" for Sadie was a little chunkier than Sadie is used to, but I told Lauren to go ahead and try. However, I did mention that Sadie has some post nasal drip and is having trouble swallowing, which leads to gagging, which leads to puking. And that breakfast was a struggle, so just watch for warning signs like lips or teeth clamped shut, gagging, etc. But I wanted Sadie to try it, it was cheeseburger and green beans and Sadie's not used to eating food like that. It was good for her to try something new. Miss Lauren said Sadie ate 6 bites, which is amazing!! Way to go Sadie (and Lauren).

Sadie didn't take a nap (no surprise there), instead Miss Lauren took her for a walk outside while the other kids slept. I'm sure Sadie really liked that!

And when I came back to pick her up everybody still had smiles on their faces! Yay! Success.

However, Sadie almost always makes a good first impression...so we'll see how Friday goes! To be fair, we did warn them that Friday may be a scream-all-day kind of day. They didn't even flinch. Really, I love these people.

In other news daycare cleaned out my diaper bag and then kept it all there, so when we went to the mechanic to have them look at my AC on our way home, I wasn't prepared for poop or puke. I had nothing. No rags, no diapers, no wipes, no change of clothes. Nothing. I was so frustrated and embarrassed. Needless to say, by the time we got home Sadie (and Mommy) was a stinky mess and went straight into the tub!

Oh, and our handicap parking permit came in the mail today, so that's pretty exciting!

Day Care Doom

So, I had this fantastic idea that Sadie would start day care at United Cerebral Palsy (UCP) this winter. I worked it out so it fits into our schedule, we went and toured, then did a little orientation with her teachers. She was so happy when we visited and all the little kids wanted to touch her and play with her wheelchair.

But now, it's the night before we go, and I'm totally freaked out!!

What if she screams all day? They're going to hate her! What if she pukes on them first thing? What if they don't feed her right? What if they lay her on the floor and she refluxes all over their carpet? What if she chokes on something? What if I didn't label her stuff well enough? What if I forget something?

There are so many things to think about that I've spent the last 2 hours packing her bag and making a special "journal" to keep in communication with her teachers.

They asked me to write out feeding instructions. I drew pictures. I also wrote out what to do if her button comes out for some reason (they have a real fear of this, although, it's never happened...yet). I put this all in one of those composition notebooks I had leftover from my classroom years ago.

Then I made a section for communication between me and the teachers. I need to know if she poops, I need to know how much liquid she got. These are things I obsess over on a daily basis to make sure my child is healthy!! I want to know if she threw up every time they fed her, I want to know if she screamed all day and they couldn't calm her down. And I want to know if she had a great day and took a nap and interacted with all the other little kids and sat independently at the table.

Do you think I'm asking them to do too much? I mean, it's Special Needs daycare after all, they've got to know they're going to get some high maintenance kids (parents?).

I'm sure I will calm down after a couple of weeks, but tonight I am not calm. I'm not sure I'm even going to sleep tonight.

I'll be sure to report back tomorrow and let you know how it went.

Sadie's going to day care!!

Sadie's going to start attending day care. I know, weird.

I think Sadie needs more time around other children. She loves it when she hears kids playing or sees another child (even if that child is 6 or 7). And we don't really have a lot of opportunities to interact with other children. Some of that is my fault because I don't participate in mommy groups and things, but taking Sadie on a field trip to the children's museum can quickly become a disaster. Sometimes Sadie goes to childcare at the gym. She usually stays in the infant room, and all the babies crawl all over her and grab at her hair. She loves it. But they're not equipped for a special needs kid, so sometimes taking her there is more work than it's worth.

But we found special needs day care at United Cerebral Palsy (UCP).

I kind of had heard about UCP when Sadie was first diagnosed and things were being thrown at us from all directions, but she was so little then, and their services seemed like they were for bigger kids. And anyway, even if we knew about day care then, Sadie couldn't have gone. She needed me, and only I would do. All.Day.Long.

But now Sadie's bigger, and she still needs me, but not as much as when she was a baby. So, today we took a tour of the facility at UCP...which really meant going into the classroom and talking to the lead teacher. As soon as we walked through the door Sadie could hear kids playing outside on the playground and she got really happy! Everybody there was so nice. And they knew how to interact with Sadie and talk to her, they weren't afraid of her because she's different. And of course they told her how pretty she is...because it's true.

We saw the 1-year-olds room, and we got there just at the beginning of nap time. The lights were out and precious little ones were snuggled onto their cots with their blankies. They were so cute. Some weren't napping, just laying there. Some needed patting or rubbing, so there was a teacher helping to do that. And there was one who just wasn't interested in a nap at all, so he was playing quietly in the corner by himself. I told her Sadie doesn't nap, she said, "that's okay, we have other kids that don't nap, we'll help her with whatever she needs at that time." We agreed that some quiet time with the lights down did seem like a good idea, even if she never fell asleep.

The more I talked to the lead teacher and asked questions, the more I realized how wonderful this could be for Sadie. They have a lunch menu and the cook will put it in the blender and puree it for Sadie and they'll feed it to her by mouth!! But they'll also use her tube as necessary. This teacher, who couldn't have been a day over 24, wasn't phased by anything... I asked about meltdowns, she said they're used to it, these are toddlers, they can handle it. I asked about puke, she said they have strong stomachs and it doesn't bother them. I asked about rocking and bouncing and she said they don't really have anything, but that they have a lot of teachers and they'll give her the movement she needs. (I looked at her like she's crazy, she doesn't know) They even told me that as she gets settled, they can talk to the therapists in the other part of the building and see if they have equipment Sadie can use. And they encouraged me to invite her therapists to come visit her at day care and talk to her teachers about what else they can do to help.

We agreed that even though Sadie will probably be 2 when she starts coming, that we'd start her out in the 1-year-old room because it's a smaller group of kids and it's a little more calm. Good idea.

So, the ONLY downside is that it's REALLY far away from where we live now, and will be even farther from our new house. But, that's not really a bad thing because it's only about 15 minutes from where Sadie has physical therapy with Tami twice a week. I'm hoping we can run to UCP after therapy and then I can go somewhere with wifi and get a few hours of uninterrupted work done. Even though we'd have to drive 45 minutes (one way) for therapy, it makes it worth it if Sadie can go to "school" and make some friends and play with other kids.

I'm really excited about this! I can't wait to get this started! Sadie's getting to be a big kid and before you know it, I'll be writing about her first day of school.