Political Banana

Recently I registered in a contest to have dinner with President Obama. I did not win. Though that registration my email address was given to the democratic congressional campaign committee. Once a day (sometimes twice) I get an email from them always with the same message - donate money. Some of the emails come from Nancy Pelosi, or Bill Clinton or some other high profile democratic politician. They all ask me to donate money and that has caused me quite a bit of annoyance. So I have begun replying to their emails (all individual replies) asking them in return to donate to my wife's cause.

My wife is raising money to help support Phoenix Childrens Hospital. That hospital does amazing things for children which has a direct impact upon our community. Sadie, in our lives, is an example. Below is a transcript of a recent reply I've given to one of their emails. There might be a bit of tension in the email - but considering this is roughly
the 100th email I've written with zero response, or more importantly a donation, the tone has become more and more malicious on my part.

Enjoy.



--- On Sat, 10/9/10, Jon Vogel, DCCC Executive Director wrote:

From: Jon Vogel, DCCC Executive Director
Subject: Arizona Democrats are Counting on You
To: "brian beck"
Date: Saturday, October 9, 2010, 10:53 AM


brian --

I know you are getting tons of emails. The truth is November's election is in a little over three weeks and it all comes down to the actions we take right now to get out our message and turn out Democrats to the polls.

The margins of victory have no room for error for any Democrat to sit on the sidelines. If you care about the progress we have made for America, we must act now. Here are the three best ways you can get involved to help retain our Democratic Majority in November:

• Sign up to Volunteer -- We can put you in touch with a local campaign in your area who needs your help now, on the phones, knocking on doors and passing out literature. We urgently need volunteers on the ground. We know exactly which voters we need to target. We just need folks to make it happen.
• Ask your friends to Volunteer -- Post a link on Facebook, tweet it out, or simply press forward on this email and send to ten friends. Every committed Democrat needs to get involved and we are counting on you. The Republicans are counting on Obama Democrats to stay home -- let's prove them wrong.
• Can't volunteer? Donate! -- Outfitting a grassroots campaign organizer with a kit costs $28 dollars - contribute that today and it could mean that one more campaign has one more volunteer who has the resources it will take for victory on Election Day. $100 could cover production of over a 1000 door hangers. We urgently need your support.

It's all come down to these final three weeks.

We cannot wake up on November 3rd regretting we didn't do more. I need you in this game. Stand with Speaker Pelosi and President Obama and let's prove the Republicans wrong. They have underestimated us before but let's show them this is their biggest miscalculation of all.

Onward to Victory,

Jon Vogel
DCCC Executive Director



Jon,

All you've done is ask me for money. One email, specific to my location just reminded me to vote early. I thought that was tremendous. Of the rest of the emails you and your pals never mention why I should donate money other than to stop to evil empire of Palins - and even then you do nothing to support your need of why. With that nebulous request in tow, I'll simply respond by asking you to donate to my cause:

http://www.firstgiving.com/sadiebeck

Helping sick children. I know that isn't in your agenda because sick Children don't vote, and because they are sick they are less likely to make it to voting age therefore making them even less valuable to you, however considering you really are only furthering the interests of your political machine, I'll just ask politely for you to donate and expect you to do nothing for me except take - and never give.

Brian

Sadie's radio debut

Yesterday Sadie and I had the opportunity to be part of something big. KTAR, a local radio station here hosted a Radiothon to raise money for the children's hospital. It started Monday at 3pm and went until Tuesday at 7pm...and I'm not sure, but I don't think it even went over night. In just those few hours, they raised OVER $1million! The final total was $1,054,965. That is a LOT of money.


But even more amazing was to hear how many lives this hospital has effected, and I don't just mean this year, I'm talking EVER. Local celebrities like Kurt Warner and John McCain have been effected by this hospital. (side note: I was really hoping we'd get to meet Kurt Warner, but apparently he's too busy with Dancing with the Stars to even be in town! How cool would that have been though? A picture of Sadie and Kurt for the baby book?! Awesome.) They even played a story of Glenn Beck talking about how his daughter had fetal strokes and came to the NICU at Phoenix Children's Hospital.

So, Sadie and I were asked to come tell our story on the radio for people to hear. Our story is special because we were part of the Neuro-NICU. There are only 2 NICUs in the country who meet the criteria to be labeled Neuro-NICU, and PCH is one of them. A number of other hospitals do brain cooling, but even that is fairly new technology, not a lot of people know about it. But because of our amazing story, they asked if we'd also be part of future events like this. I told her to call us for the rest of our lives, we will shout our story from the rooftops if it'll help raise money for this hospital!

Anyway, Sadie was a hit, of course. The moment we walked through the door we were surrounded by people doting on her. What a special little girl she is that she is able to light up a room already, at 8 months old. Even the old men couldn't stay away! I mean, I think she's the cutest little thing...but I'm sorta biased, so I love when others confirm that for me! And she was so good. She was so upset in the car on the way there, but as soon as we got there she nursed herself to sleep for a half hour...long enough to recharge her batteries. That made a world of difference!

So without further ado, here's the video of our interview! Sorry I can't imbed it, but if you click the link below you should be able to watch it.

Radio Interview

I also want to remind you that I'm still working on getting ready for that half marathon in January. It's another fundraiser for Phoenix Children's Hospital. I've committed to raise $1500 and I'm a third of the way there. I'm a little disappointed in how many people HAVEN'T donated (yet). So many of you take for granted that your children are healthy. And so many of you love Sadie and know what this hospital has done for us. THEY SAVED MY BABY'S LIFE!!! Please consider giving. It doesn't have to be a lot...nobody will even know how much except you and me. But getting to that $1500 mark is really important; for me, for Sadie, and for the hospital. You can find the fundraising page either on the right side of the blog, or by clicking here. It's easy to give online and it's safe and secure. So please don't delay any longer in donating.

Thank you. And thank you Arizona for being so generous during the Radiothon this week.

Sadie's Acugraph

2 weeks ago Sadie saw an acupuncturist for the first time (don't worry, he didn't poke her!) to see if we could get the energy flowing through her body in balance. His name is Michael, and he is very nice. The first thing he did was draw up an acugraph on Sadie. To do this he had a special machine that measured her energy through its exit points in her nail beds, both hands and feet. He used this probe with like a cotton q-tip on the end of it. It was completely painless, but of course Sadie screamed the whole time! This was Sadie's first acugraph:

I know it's small, so I'll explain a little. Each energy line has a left and a right, those are the two lines you see for each one. The 12, in order, are lungs, pericardium (the muscles around your heart), heart, small intestine, triple energy (these are your head, chest, and gut), large intestine, spleen, liver, kidney, bladder, gall bladder, and stomach. According to this, she averages out at 164%, ideal is 100%, so her energy was pretty high across the board. The red ones show that the energy line running through her heart are both higher than her high average. The purple ones are split, meaning there is a large discrepancy between her right and left sides. You can see there are quite a few of these. The green are normal, meaning they aren't split and the both fall in her average range...however, they're still high.

We left with instructions on how to 1. lower her heart energy (which has nothing to do with the actual workings of her heart, by the way), 2. balance her right and left sides, and 3. lower her energy overall. And I faithfully rubbed and tapped all the appropriate spots...for 2 weeks. I should also note that this first appointment was the day before our first movement lesson (ABM therapy).

Yesterday, we visited Michael again. He did the same thing with the probe and the computer and stuff, and Sadie screamed through it again. But this time I was noticing the numbers were a lot lower. And a couple of times he re-measured one. Then when we were all through he told me he had to check his computer because those numbers seemed extremely low. But, it was working just fine. Here's what Sadie's second acugraph looked like:


Amazing, right? Michael said this is the most drastic change he's ever seen. You'll notice that everything is balanced right and left. And instead of the 164% she was at before, she's now at 53%! Now, says Michael, she's too low. These aren't lines of energy like we think of energy amping us up or being calm, these are flows indicating health and vitality. We still want Sadie to be closer to 100%. However, there's apparently no treatment for low levels, only high levels. So, Michael did some poking and used the percussor (vibrator) and tried to open up her main lines.

We go back next week for a third acugraph, then I imagine we'll be done with Michael. In the meantime, we have 3 more movement lessons this week (hopefully they'll be BOWEL movement lessons!)

An open letter to Sadie's elusive teeth

Dear Teeth,

We read that drool was the first sign of you, however, we've been enduring drool for 4 months now and we still don't see you! Then there were hours of crying (luckily not at night), and biting (luckily not while nursing), and now we can feel you...sorta.

It's just that we can't wait for you to pop through! We want to see Sadie's toothy grin, instead of this gummy one (although it's pretty cute too). We aren't only excited for the drooling, crying, and pain to stop, we are also excited for chewing!

You see, Sadie is learning to use her hands and we hope that soon she'll be able to put things (like bananas and crackers and spoons) in her mouth. It'll be much better if you're there to help. We understand that your job is important, and because we have such positive experiences with our own teeth , we'd really like Sadie to experience the pleasure of having teeth...sooner rather than later.

So, teeth, please come soon!

Love,
Mama and Daddy (and Sadie) Beck

Random

I think we has humans, in our core nature, cannot stand the nature of randomness. We crave structure and meaning behind events so badly that we'll resort to an unprovable ethos: karma, God's divine plan or any other similar creative process. Askance, I wonder if the great religions of the world are not really to satiate man's longing for an answer to the question of death, but rather to give meaning to a life that is on the entirety random.

Now certainly this isn't to take snide shots at any faith, quite the contrary, so let us not get bogged down in the meta-theory and continue on our quest to harbor true uncertainty.

We live in a world that hinges upon probability and we practice much of our habitual undertakings hoping to garner larger probability in our favor. The large organic movement is partially in order to be "healthier" and avoid carcinogens latent in commercial agricultural. Does that mean the purchaser of the organic apple is less likely to contract cancer? Research is murky, but the obvious answer is that a haphazard foray into organic items will only slightly reduce the odds of cancer such a tiny amount that the actual good cause the apple produces is perhaps meaningless. Yet we, as humans, know that if we continue to eat enough of those apples, and pears, and other healthier items, then the cumulative score will outweigh whatever risk we inherently have for some health malady. We bank on those odds regularly.

The simple fact is: we really have no clue what will happen tomorrow and despite our careful plodding and good intention, we may tomorrow meet a drunken driver with just a bit too much in him and our end will be sealed. Hands in the air, despairing, the loved ones will say, "It was because of that is dead and we'll confide in that and use that as our mechanism to cope with the abominable sadness we feel." And there is agreement...Yet - that is exactly the circumstance that my criticism is leveled against.

We prepared diligently when Sadie was belly fruit. All of our careful doings seems to be done for nothing when she was born. Fast forward to now as that story has been hashed out. How do we cope with the fact that Sadie was born with special needs?

I think that, fundamentally, is a question that is worth asking, but is not the core question we should be asking as parents! We, as humans, as creatures all in an equally suspended state should ask a question: how do we deal with this?!

We don't have special circumstances, we have different circumstances. Our lives have a measure of randomness slightly different from others.

Now I just need my wife to cease the what-if-tormentia she suffers from and embrace the all important -is-. For that is our greatest joy. Embrace that which happens for it is and that is defines us as humanity.




We did not get a banana picture as Sadie had a pretty awful day. She screamed while teething and screamed while pooping. We'll not go into detail but note that at one point I ran in a mighty hurry to wet towels. Being a parent is the best!

Update on ABM Therapy

Sadie has been to ABM (movement) therapy 5 times now, and she is a completely different baby! I want to share how she's changed in just the last week and a half:

1. Her vision has improved. She can see. I mean, she could see before, but now she LOOKS at things. ANd her eyes focus together. And the fluttering eyelids is lessening. She fixes her attention on objects and really looks at them. Last night we visited Grandpa and he hasn't seen her since we started this therapy. He just kept saying, "look at her eyes! They look great! They look normal! You can tell she can see things better!"

2. No car screaming. Let me say that again in case it didn't sink in: NO. CAR. SCREAMING!!! Somehow, magically, Sadie is now perfectly okay with the car. All my dreams are coming true!!


3. Sadie sleeps at night...in her own bed. And when she doesn't sleep, I just don't care anymore, I'm not going to stay up with her. She's learning to put herself to sleep, so I just turn over and ignore her and she goes back to sleep. If she wants to nurse, she'll let me know. This has allowed me to get MORE than 5 hours of sleep a night and boy, do I feel good!! Oh, and this week she also took a 2 hour nap in her crib by herself.

4. She's becoming aware of her body. Sadie has started kicking her legs, pulling her knees to her chest when she's laying on her back. She's started using her hands more by batting at things. She's still pretty uncoordinated, but I see her trying to bring her hands to her mouth. Her hips are loose and range of motion is returning. She can also roll over. But she doesn't. But I've seen her do it more than once, so I know she can. I feel like once she really gets the hang of using those hands she'll have more motivation to roll over. Also, she can sit more independently for longer periods of time.


5. We're seeing more personality. Last night my brother was in Phoenix to do a show and I took Sadie to meet up with him before he had to go on stage. We were just sitting in the car, but she was smiling and happy and showing off for her uncle. Then we also met up with Grandpa and it was the same thing for him. She has turned into a happy, smiley baby instead of a screamy baby who needs to bounce and nurse all day.

All this after only 5 sessions!! We will have 3 or 4 more next week before we take a break and see what Sadie can do. All of the sudden crawling by Christmas doesn't seem too unreasonable of a goal!!

If you are interested in Movement Therapy for your sick or disabled child, yourself, or anybody you know (even those who are perfectly well!) you can visit Michelle's website here, or here. You can also find amazing videos of her work on youtube (you can even see Sadie!). And even if you don't live in Phoenix it's okay, she will FIND a way to help you!! I strongly encourage you to check her out!

How do Mommies do it all?!

I'm experimenting with a new tool to help me get organized. Now that Sadie doesn't scream all day, I thought it'd be nice to get some things done. So, I made myself a "household notebook." This notebook is supposed to help me keep all my crap in one place (ie. bills, random magazines I get in the mail that I didn't subscribe to, papers from Sadie's doctor appointments, to do lists, etc.), but it's also supposed to help me do.my.chores. yeah right. You know those moms that always have a clean house and clean kids who are dressed in clothes that match and dinner's on the table and precisely 6:00 every night? That's not me. And apparently I'm not alone. Mommy, blogger starkravingmadmommy.com (and my favorite blog to read), also struggles with getting everything done. And she has WAAAAAAYYYYY more to deal with than me!! I think she's doing a great job, but don't take my word for it, she's going to tell us all about it in her special guest post!! And if you want more hilarity and frivolity and just plain fun stories about her crazy life that is driving her stark raving mad, visit her blog. I promise you won't be disappointed! __________________________________________________________________

How Much Do I Suck? Let Me Count the Ways

I had an email this week from a reader named Jenny, asking me how I balance it all -- raising four kids, special needs, managing the Peanut Butter Kid's homebound schooling, running the house, and writing the blog. She asked me what I do to manage my stress besides drinking Frodkas.

I told her the truth: The answer is, I don't do it all, all that well.

Seriously. Or maybe I've just stopped giving a crap about a lot of stuff. My house is a disaster. I keep the downstairs relatively clean because the Peanut Butter Kid's homebound school teacher comes twice a week, and nothing motivates me to clean like a visitor. Particularly a visitor who's probably trained to be on the lookout for children who might benefit from the services of Child Protection.

If it wasn't for that teacher, and the fact that I occasionally babysit an 18-month old that eats everything, our downstairs would be really, really bad. Upstairs? Horrendous.

We have lived in this house for seven months, and I still have not unpacked all the boxes. Also, I haven't installed blinds in the playroom. Our neighbor commented that she notices we leave the light on all the time. Even at night. And did we know it was still on. At night. I'm pretty sure that was the nice way of staying please install some blinds because your hall light is keeping us awake at night. She may have also said something along the lines of "bless your heart," and we all know what that means.

I'll get to it. Eventually.

Also, I was supposed to be the co-leader of our Girl Scout troop this year, and I had to 'fess up that I couldn't do it. I feel incredibly guilty about that, but there's a limit to what I can do. Sometimes you have to say no. Even when you've already said yes.

I'm behind on paying the bills, not because we don't have enough money, but because paying the bills requires me to focus on something for more than five minutes, plus do math, all of which is rather unpleasant. Once in a while I get a nastygram from one of our utility companies, and then I freak out and pay all the bills. My laundry isn't done, the lawn isn't mowed, and my husband is working like 70 hours a week right now so I can't even ask him to do more than he already does.

Also, I eat too many cookies.

I don't care.

I just don't have the energy or the mental capacity to worry about this stuff right now. Even the cookie problem. If it takes the edge off my day, that's just how it's going to be. I am done beating myself up about it. I figure it's better than having a Frodka every time I'm stressed.

Also? I am excellent at rationalizations. Cookies are okay because they're better than becoming an alcoholic. I'm okay with my coffee addiction because it's better than heroin. See how that works? Please let me know if I can provide you with any rationalizations as well. It's a fun game for me, like Scrabble.

Actually, whenever there's a night when I think "boy, I could really use a drink," I don't have one. Because alcoholism runs in my family and scares the crap out of me. I used to run as a stress-reliever. That's healthier than cookies, but I just can't get to it right now.

And that's okay.

I've written before about how I have to triage the kids' problems. The rest of it is kind of like that, too. I prioritize. And that means that corralling the dust bunnies buffalo is really, really low on the list. My family is at the top; if this were a Venn diagram, my marriage and my kids would have equal size and overlap. I give my marriage and my kids equal footing in terms of importance, but of course the kids get more attention than my husband. Which doesn't seem at all fair when you consider that he is supporting all six of us, and the kids are basically bleeding us dry.

So, yeah, maybe I need to bump our relationship up on the list a bit. Because some day, God willing, these kids will grow up as functional members of society and move out. And I hope my husband will still be here.

The thing is, I need to be somewhere on that priority list too. I don't need a bar-cruisin' moms' night out or a spa day every weekend (although that would rock). Just getting out of the house with a friend to go to a children's consignment sale is enough for me. I need, need, need to take a break.

Preferably right now. But I'll take the opportunity for a break whenever it shows up. Sometimes I giddily discover at 7:00 p.m. that we need milk. And I'm all, I'll go! I'll get it! Oh, the kids are already in their jammies ... darn. I guess I have to go alone. And then I drive to the store blasting Eminem or something equally inappropriate for children. By myself. It's bliss.

Pathetic, but true. You have to seize the moment.

For me, the best stress reliever is writing my blog. I love writing, and have always wanted to become a published author. I always thought it would be with fiction; it never occurred to me that I would end up being a humor writer. Especially because I was so lonely after we moved to Texas, the blog -- and connecting with people in similar situations -- has been an amazing outlet for me.

The thing I'm struggling with right now is finding the time to write the blog and work on the book. However, being as how it's my lifelong dream, I'm going to make it happen. I'll sleep when I'm dead, right?

I do think it's critically important to have something that's yours, that you don't have to share, something that gives you a break. When I first had my twins, I joined my local mothers of multiples club, and I went to a meeting every month. It was on the calendar, so I went. And hung out with other cool moms who understood.

Jenny, good luck finding something to help with your stress. Know that you are not alone. Sometimes just knowing you're not the only one who feels like she's drowning, is helpful.

Best wishes!